Dummies of the world unite!
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I agree that this world is full of many many stupid people, but i've been wondering... can they really be as dumb as they seem?
  English Corner Happenings... It's very hard to defend people these days concerning their intelligence when I hear the conversations that go on among them.


2/26/02
Mama always told me to wear clean undies...

Besnick: "'I besmirched myself.' That means 'soiled.' Hah, I'm gonna use that for my sentance."
Ryan: "'I besmirched someone else's pants.' HAHAHA, that's what I'm gonna use."
Besnick: "Don't steal my sentance."
Ryan: "Haha, I besmirch my bed every night."

2/18/02
Who Are You?:

Substitute Teacher: "Thomas?"
Tom: "Here."
Besnick: "Did she just say Tennis?"
Robin: "Yeah, that's what it sounded like... Who's Tennis?"
Me: "She said 'Thomas.'"
Robin: "Haha, oh..."
Besnick: "Oh, it sounded like she said Tennis."
((Tom starts to walk over))
Besnick: "Hey Tennis!! Take a seat!"

2/6/02
Blind Faith:

Robin: "i wonder what kind of people write in to these things... 'with Jesus' love you can accomplish anything.' "
Ryan: "i love Jesus. ive eaten his body and drank his blood a couple times. now thats love."
Besnick: "some girl in my study hall asked me if i worship Satan."
Ryan: "yeah, you told me about that."
Besnick: "i was like, 'WHAT THE HELL?!' "
Ryan: "i wouldve told her that i did. 'IF YOU LOVE SATAN YOU WILL GET EVERYTHING THAT YOU WANT!' HAHAHAHAHAHA... 'i warship satin...' whats that from?"
Besnick: "isnt it from that Remote Control movie?"
Ryan: "that Barney Fife guy said it... thats not his name though. i cant remember what his real name is...."
Besnick: "i think that movies called Remote Control"
Ryan: "DON KNOTTS! that was his name... wait, i dont think thats the same guy though..."
Besnick: "Remote Control.... no, it was called Stay Tuned!"
Ryan: "yeah! Stay Tuned. it wasnt Don Knotts though, it was that guy from Beatlejuice..."

2/6/02
Where are you from?

Olla: "Jeffrey Dahmer was from Milwaukee."
Ryan: "what was wrong with him?"



1/30/02
Where is my China-man?:

Besnick: "BOIVEN!!"
Mike: "i had a dream she kicked my Chinese guy out. I was running down the hall and she just pushed him out the door and told him to never come back..."
Ryan: "what?"
Mike: "i dunno, it just seems like something miss o'neal would do."
Besnick: "look, shes wearing boots, too."



1/29/02
Dead Body Debate:
(brought on by a discusion about Wuthering Heights by Emily Bronte)

Mike: "That's gross though, he dug up her skeleton..."
Besnick: "She wasn't a skeleton yet though."
Mike & Ryan: "Yes she was."
Besnick: "she was only dead for like two weeks though..."
Mike: "no, it was like two years later that he did it."
Besnick: "but she still wouldnt be a skeleton."
Mike: "fine, maybe she wasnt completely decomposed yet, but she was well on her way."
Ryan: "yeah, she couldve still had some skin an shit on her."
Mike: "but she was pretty much a skeleton..."
Ryan: "how long does it take to turn into a skeleton anyway? not that long."
Besnick: "dude, it takes like two thousand years to turn into a skeleton."
Ryan: "haha, no way."
Mike: "dude, it doesnt take that long."
Besnick: "yeah, it takes like two thousand years or something. a really long time."
Ryan: "so youre saying jesus just turned into a skeleton? just like whoosh hes suddenly a skeleton?"
Besnick: "i dunno."

Typewriter yo, typewriter...
  The Perfect Murder Debate:

Mike: "for one-hundred thousand dollars i would definately kill someone."
Ryan: "but youd have to do it without getting caught."
Mike: "yeah, but thats easy. all you need is those plastic gloves and a plastic suit an stuff."
Ryan: "but then you would have to go through all the trouble of putting all that shit on."
Mike: "dude, if i was getting paid one-hundred thousand dollars i would take the time to put all that on. those guys always do."
Ryan: "you might as well just wrap the whole room in plastic then."
Mike: "yeah, i would. then you dont have to worry about cleaning up."
Tom: "just rent a flatbed and line the inside with plastic. then, when youre done, you can just roll it all up in the plastic and get rid of it."
Mike: "my moms got like a two-hundred thousand dollar life insurance plan. if she died my sister and i would get it. thousand for her thousand for me... but thats only if shes dead..."

Dont you think you would notice if there was someone standing on top of your car?